Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

Home
Religious Music & Entertainment
Where sibs are a sin

Where sibs are a sin

Last updated on: October 31, 2013 at 11:42 am by Peter T. Chattaway

Where sibs are a sin 2013-10-31T11:42:33-07:00 Peter T. Chattaway

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

For the haziest of reasons, there is a near taboo on the portrayal of adult brothers and sisters in film

In When Harry Met Sally, Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan famously argued over whether men and women could be friends without one of them wanting to have sex with the other. When I first saw the film 11 years ago, I found it funny, entertaining and a good conversation piece, but I couldn’t help thinking that Crystal and Ryan — neither of whom seemed to have any family beyond their fellow single New Yorkers — had overlooked something. I could certainly think of a few women in my own life for whom this was a non-issue, and one of them was sitting right next to me in the theatre. I refer, of course, to my sister.

In Hollywood, it is common to find stories about brother-sister relationships if both sides of the equation happen to be children. But among adults, men and women typically interact only if there exists the slightest possibility of sex or romance between them. If an adult does have a sibling, it almost always turns out that the man has a brother, while the woman has a sister. Sitcoms, with their traditional focus on the nuclear family, are a perfect case in point. Take The Simpsons. The complex mix of jealousy, mutual annoyance and heartwarming moral support between Bart and Lisa is among that show’s most endearing aspects. But among the adults, Marge has two sisters, while Homer, we discover in one episode, has a half-brother. It is as though the relatives were an extension of the principal characters, right down to their gender.

Television is such a vast medium, and the potential for diversity so great, that exceptions to this rule are not impossible to find (for example, the siblings played by David Schwimmer and Courtney Cox Arquette on Friends, Mulder’s abducted sister on The X-Files). But movies about adult brother-sister relationships are an exceptionally rare breed. Thus it is rather remarkable that we have not one, but two very different films that touch on this theme in theatres at the moment. Vertical Limit is a typically explosive would-be blockbuster, in which Chris O’Donnell rounds up a rescue team to save his sister, played by Robin Tunney, who is trapped in a crevasse following a deadly avalanche. A very different film is You Can Count on Me, which won the Grand Jury Prize at this year’s Sundance film festival. Critics have lavished praise on Ken Lonergan’s intimate tale of a man who returns to his sister’s home and, for a while at least, becomes a sort of surrogate father to her eight-year-old son. Several reviewers have even observed that the film’s central relationship, between brother and sister, is rarely explored in film.

Although I have two sisters myself, I must admit I did not notice this blind spot in our popular culture until about four years ago, when two European films about adult siblings came to Vancouver only a few weeks apart from each other. In André Téchiné’s Ma Saison Préférée (My Favourite Season), Catherine Deneuve and Daniel Auteuil play a middle-aged brother and sister who renew their childhood intimacy while coping with their mother’s illness and the possible breakdown of Deneuve’s marriage. Seeing the film, I began to wonder how my own siblings and I might deal with similar issues, and I realized very few films had ever stimulated such thoughts. Shortly afterwards, I caught Mike Leigh’s superb cross-over hit Secrets & Lies. There are several compelling characters in that Oscar-nominated film, but the two that stand out, at least for me, are Maurice (Timothy Spall), a married, childless photographer, and his sister Cynthia (Brenda Blethyn), a neurotic single mother whose obsessive behaviour tends to drive away the very people she loves most. In one scene, Cynthia, unlucky in love and estranged from her daughter, clings to Maurice and breaks down in tears. He is the one man who could never entirely abandon her, not even if he wanted to; he is also the only member of her family who has shared her history and knows the pain she feels.

Since then, I have kept my eyes open for more films on this topic, but have seen relatively few. One glorious exception was The Opposite of Sex, the Christina Ricci film that had not one, but two, adult brother-sister relationships at its core. Ricci stars as a cynical teen sexpot who visits her gay half-brother (Martin Donovan) and seduces his lover, but for my money, the film belonged to Lisa Kudrow. She plays an uptight spinster whose brother, Donovan’s former lover, has died of AIDS before the movie begins. Kudrow’s character is a social misfit, and at times she really can’t stand being a part of this highly dysfunctional social circle, but she hangs out with these people because of her continuing love for her deceased sibling; he is her connection to that community.

When a mainstream American film covers adult siblings, they are almost always exclusively brothers, as in The Fabulous Baker Boys and A River Runs Through It, or exclusively sisters, as in Hanging Up and The Other Sister. In Inventing the Abbots, two brothers from one family compete for the attention of three sisters from another family. European and independent film-makers fall into this habit, too. Edward Burns’ first film was the fraternally minded The Brothers McMullen, and Woody Allen, who has no brothers but is close to his kid sister in real life (she tags along on his European jazz tour in the documentary Wild Man Blues) has focussed on exclusively female siblings in films like Interiors and Hannah and Her Sisters. Even when the opportunity to break the mold presents itself in a true story like Hilary and Jackie, the filmmakers focus so narrowly on the titular sisters that you might miss the fact that they have a brother, too.

Siblings tend to be of the same gender when they are introduced as supporting characters, too. Brothers give men an opportunity to bounce ideas around with other men, while sisters perform a similar function for women. (Consider Renee Zellweger’s impulsive heart-to-hearts with her more skeptical sister, played by Bonnie Hunt, in Jerry Maguire.) If siblings of the opposite sex do come along, it is often not for the benefit of their immediate relatives, but to make life more complicated for the in-laws. In Annie Hall and Meet the Parents, women have brothers who exist largely to make things awkward for the boyfriend of the woman in question. In Proof of Life, David Morse is abducted by terrorists and his sister, played by Pamela Reed, flies to South America to be with his wife, who is played by Meg Ryan. Morse and Reed do not appear together in the film; instead, Reed spends her time with Ryan and expresses the anxieties that Ryan bottles up. Reed is important to the story not as Morse’s sister, but as Ryan’s sister-in-law.

Why does Hollywood pay so little attention to the brother-sister bond? It can’t be for lack of experience. George Lucas has three sisters. Years before Tom Hanks worked with Steven Spielberg on Second World War projects, he starred in Big, a film written and produced by Steven’s sister Anne. Big was directed by Penny Marshall, who got her start starring in TV shows produced by her brother Garry. Until Annette Bening made an honest man of him, the only woman you could safely say Warren Beatty would never sleep with was his elder sibling Shirley Maclaine. Rock-and-roll journalist turned movie director Cameron Crowe based a small but pivotal character in his semi-autobiographical film Almost Famous on his big sister; it is Anita (Zooey Deschanel) who introduces William (Patrick Fugit), Crowe’s alter ego, to the music that defines his career. Perhaps it was their relationship that inspired Crowe to cast real-life siblings John and Joan Cusack as fictitious siblings in Say Anything…, Crowe’s directorial debut and one of the better films of the 1980s.

I suspect the reason brother-sister relationships are so rarely made the focus of a film is due to a combination of marketing and habit. For promotional purposes, it usually helps to have at least one huge star of each gender in your film, even if one of them is not all that significant to the story. (You may recall how Angelina Jolie was prominently featured in the advertising for Gone in 60 Seconds, despite being a minor character. That, of course, was yet another movie about two brothers, with Nicolas Cage returning to his car-stealing ways in an effort to save Giovanni Ribisi’s butt. And while we’re on the subject, it may be a measure of mainstream discomfort with sibling affection that Jolie and her brother, James Haven, became the butt of so many incest jokes after they appeared together at this year’s Oscars.) If you’re making a film for children, the easiest way to appeal to your target audience is to make the leads play brother and sister, as in Alaska, where Thora Birch and Vincent Kartheiser head off into the wild to rescue their father. But if you’re making a movie for grown-ups, sexual tension is a must, and siblings don’t play any part in that — usually.

There are exceptions, of course. Often, when I bring this subject up with people, they reply, “Oh, wasn’t there some movie with Alan Rickman about a brother and sister who have an affair with each other?” Indeed there was. It was called Close My Eyes and it starred Clive Owen (Croupier) and Saskia Reeves (Antonia and Jane); Rickman played Reeves’ husband. A Very Brady Sequel — a film based on a TV show about an all-sister family that joins an all-brother family — flirted with the idea of making Greg and Marcia more than housemates. In the comprehensively kinky Cruel Intentions, Sarah Michelle Gellar makes a bet with step-brother Ryan Philippe and promises to sleep with him if he wins. (“You can put it anywhere,” she offers.) Sometimes quasi-incestuous material turns up in the most seemingly innocent of places. Take the Star Wars trilogy. Luke Skywalker (Mark Hamill) joins the fight against the Empire because he’s infatuated with distressed damsel Princess Leia (Carrie Fisher). But in Return of the Jedi, it is revealed that they are, in fact, twins. Leia looks stunned when she hears the news, but nevertheless, she says, “Somehow, I’ve always known.” It’s an odd remark, coming from someone who planted a lingering kiss on Luke’s lips just to make Han Solo jealous in The Empire Strikes Back.

But once in a while, a film comes out that just lets siblings be siblings — though they usually have their issues to deal with. Ma Saison Préférée deals with a shared mid-life crisis, while Secrets & Lies zeroes in on the harmful effects of deeply buried shame. The siblings in Vertical Limit help each other to overcome their grief over a family tragedy. And in You Can Count on Me, the siblings are defined from the beginning by the loss of their parents at an early age. As adults, Sammy (Laura Linney) copes with the loss by clinging to church and home, while Terry (Mark Ruffalo) eschews both and wanders aimlessly around the country. Still, when Terry comes home, looking for cash, he can’t help staying a little while longer and getting more involved, for better or worse, in his sister’s life.

Most love stories follow a simple formula, from boy meets girl to the final consummation, with perhaps a break-up and a reunion in the third act. But there is no obvious formula for stories about siblings. Brothers and sisters have known each other all their lives, and there is nothing to consummate between them. To make a film about them requires an extra degree of creativity, and that, unfortunately, is perhaps why so few films explore the subject.

Peter T. Chattaway takes his sisters to movies whenever he can.

— A version of this article was first published in The Vancouver Sun*.*

hannah and her sisters

river runs through it

Previous Post

December 3, 2000

Review: Joseph, King of Dreams (dir. Rob LaDuca & Robert C. Ramirez, 2000)

Next Post

February 9, 2001 Review: Hannibal (dir. Ridley Scott, 2001)

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Anglican Planet Articles BC Christian News BC Report Bible Movies Bible Review Blog Books & Culture Campus Times CBC Radio Christianity Today ChristianWeek Essays Faith Today Festival Cinemas Guide Film Journals Georgia Straight Interviews MB Herald National Catholic Register Salvationist Today's Christian Two Chairs Ubyssey Uncategorized Vancouver Courier Vancouver Sun

Select a Month August 2025 April 2025 January 2025 December 2024 November 2024 May 2024 February 2024 December 2023 May 2023 March 2023 November 2022 July 2022 June 2022 May 2022 April 2022 February 2022 January 2022 December 2021 November 2021 October 2021 September 2021 August 2021 July 2021 June 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 September 2019 July 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 April 2012 January 2012 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007 March 2007 February 2007 January 2007 December 2006 November 2006 October 2006 September 2006 August 2006 July 2006 June 2006 May 2006 April 2006 March 2006 February 2006 January 2006 December 2005 November 2005 October 2005 September 2005 August 2005 July 2005 June 2005 May 2005 April 2005 March 2005 January 2005 December 2004 November 2004 October 2004 September 2004 August 2004 July 2004 June 2004 May 2004 April 2004 March 2004 February 2004 January 2004 November 2003 October 2003 August 2003 July 2003 June 2003 May 2003 January 2003 December 2002 November 2002 August 2002 July 2002 June 2002 May 2002 March 2002 January 2002 December 2001 November 2001 September 2001 August 2001 July 2001 June 2001 April 2001 March 2001 February 2001 December 2000 November 2000 October 2000 September 2000 August 2000 July 2000 June 2000 May 2000 April 2000 March 2000 January 2000 October 1999 August 1999 May 1999 April 1999 February 1999 January 1999 December 1998 November 1998 October 1998 August 1998 July 1998 June 1998 April 1998 March 1998 January 1998 November 1997 September 1997 July 1997 June 1997 April 1997 March 1997 February 1997 January 1997 December 1996 October 1996 September 1996 June 1996 March 1996 February 1996 January 1996 April 1995 November 1994 September 1994 September 1991

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What does the name "Abraham" mean?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Shelter Strong leader Father of many Blessed man