Blessed are the virgins?

Last updated on: March 8, 2011 at 6:37 pm by TT

Blessed are the virgins? 2011-03-08T18:37:49-05:00 TT

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Mormons often congratulate themselves for having a relatively healthy theological view of sexuality, at least within the boundaries of heterosexual marriage. One problem, however, is that this positive theology of (certain kinds of) sex comes at the expense of a positive evaluation of sexual chastity. Let me explain.

It seems to me that in the history of Christianity, one may either value marriage or virginity, but it is hard to do both. In this pair, one is always superior to the other. Paul argued that viriginity and the single life were better than the married life for the sake of the Kingdom of God. Some of the traditions of Jesus’ sayings seem to support the idea that being married is actually second best to virginity. Some later traditions in the NT seek to counter this ascetic tendency, but the voice that marriage is a lesser choice to virginity is certainly strong.

This ascetic tradition takes hold in early Christianity. The precise status of the virginal life, the commitment to long term sexual abstinence as a spiritual practice, was of course debated. Some argued that it was the only acceptable life, and that marriage itself was simply an excuse to sin. Others argued that marriage was okay if you couldn’t handle it, but that virginity was better than marriage. Later compromises suggested that both marriage and virginity were equally good options for different people. Not all were called to be married and not all were called to be virginal. Perhaps we need something along these lines for our own tradition.

The problem with LDS discussions about sexual abstinence is that it is figured always as secondary to marriage. What it lacks is any positive value attached to virginity whatsoever. Sex is the uncontested good in this theology, which can only imagine virginity as the absence of this good. Sexual abstinence is either seen as a period of waiting, sometimes indefinite waiting, for the “better” option of marriage. Even in the afterlife, sexual abstinece is portrayed as a punishment, reserving marriage (and sexual activity) only for the most righteous. Such a portrayal of virginity understands it only as what it is not, what it lacks, namely sexuality, rather than seeing it as a good and virtue in its own right. It has the effect of heightening the status of sexual activity as really the only thing of any value, while sexual abstinence is either just a waiting period or a punishment. One open question is whether it is the uncontested good of sex itself that encourages those who lack it to obtain it outside of marriage.

Ironically, this view of sexual abstinence is thoroughly modern, the reversal of classical ideals where virginity is the greater good. Both Mormonism and the modern sexual revolution take ultimately the same negative view of sexual inactivity. Mormonism and the sexual revolution are not antagonistic, but two halves of the same coin. They share the view that sex is a good and that those who do not have it have failed to achieve their highest potential. Sexual activity is a critical aspect of identity for both Mormonism and modernity.

Sexual abstinence is increasingly a part of Mormon life, in ways that were not previously imagined in earlier cultural moments. Not only is the young single adult segment marrying later and later, but the rise of divorce in LDS communities, not to mention the recent turn to celibacy as the standard for gay Saints, all combine to make large portions of members fall into the category of the long-term sexually abstinent. The theology of seeing sexual abstinence as inferior to marriage, combined with the wide-spread practice of excluding single members from leadership callings reinforces socially and culturally the theological message.

Are there resources in Mormonism that can see long-term sexual abstinence in more positive terms? This is an open question. One idea might be to embrace virginity as its own kind of erotic activity. The erotics of denial are in many ways more intense and consuming than the actual satisfaction of those desires. We can certainly draw on broader Christian traditions that do value virginity as a good in and of itself. And, I’m out of ideas.

Sexuality

Previous Post

March 8, 2011

Hauglid's new critical text of the Book of Abraham manuscripts

Next Post

March 11, 2011 Ten Tidbits about the Sermon on the Mount

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category 2013 Scriptures Administrative Apologetics Atonement Bible Book of Mormon Book Review BYU Doctrine Extra-Biblical Literature Family Feminism Guests History LDS Church History Leadership Marginalia Metaphysics Mormon Culture Mormon Studies Personal Issues Political Philosophy Politics Scripture Sexuality Speculation Spotlights Studying Religion Ten Tidbits The Tenure Track Theology Tips on Applying Series Tips on Being an Independent Scholar Uncategorized

Select a Month June 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 July 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007 March 2007 February 2007 January 2007 December 2006 November 2006 October 2006 September 2006 August 2006 July 2006 June 2006 May 2006 April 2006 March 2006 February 2006 January 2006 December 2005 November 2005 October 2005 September 2005 August 2005 July 2005 June 2005 May 2005

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz