To the Candidates: “Kiss My Ulterior!”

Last updated on: May 9, 2013 at 6:07 am by Faithful Democrats

To the Candidates: “Kiss My Ulterior!” 2013-05-09T06:07:39-06:00 Faithful Democrats

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We have become a nation addicted to reality TV, and it's now spilling dangerously over into real life.

It has been a long time since I have felt as nauseated over national politics. The last time, as I recall, was when both parties became mired in the Watergate scandal that went on interminably. The supposed advantage, 36 years later, is that we have "Christian" candidates.

To that I say, "Kiss my ulterior!"

While John McCain poses with his half-smile and his manikin sidekick, reveling in the disassembly of the Democratic hopes, the donkey morphs into a jackass kicking its own. The only way to "win" the nomination, it seems, is to tear down the opposition, leaving the remains as fair game for the general election. We "swiftboat" our own.

"Experience" and "Change," enemies of the good in pursuit of the perfect, are at odds. One is ready to govern; the other will need time to find the men's room and all of that sort of thing, trusting that the phone won't ring at 3:00 am before he finds out where it is. The one ready to govern stole the china from the White House the last time around and had to return it, thereby giving experience a rather odd twist. He who advocates for change couldn't seem to rally his colleagues to effect that change while in the Senate so wants to be king so he can "work across the aisle." Curious twist that, as well.

The rest of us have had enough, already. "Experience" will be going on to Denver in second place, while "Change" will be moving from the high to the low road to regain his momentum. Whoever wins the nomination will have to steal it, thereby confirming public opinion of our political leadership.

Enter mild-mannered wannabe President McCain, spared the ordeal of having to deal with or explain his rage, often a topic of public interest.

Having already thrown out the TV and now refusing ever again to subscribe to a newspaper, I shall turn off the Internet news. I'll be damned if I will cave into the white noise that shrieks in stark terror of losing our undivided attention. Come to think of it, the fastest way to the valley of the damned is to cave into the white noise. At this point, even Lou Dobbs, current champion of "Independent's Day," is looking every bit a used car salesman who has been hit in the face with the flat side of a shovel.

We have become a nation addicted to reality-TV now spilling dangerously over into real life. To be the most powerful man or woman in the world is a rush that only the man who smoked but didn't inhale could lust after, even if it means playing second banana. There has been some suggestion that he has been inhaling of late.

Well; I have vented, and I thank you for listening. Once this thing is settled, the technique for keeping Experience or Change out of our faces and our lives will directly impact how well we maintain our sanity over the next 8 years. In the final analysis, though, no President in my lifetime has ever been a miracle worker. We muddle through with a limited number of folks thinking that to be at the top is everything. To them, perhaps, it is.

Anybody got an extra $100M for political leverage?

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