Knowing What the Card Means: Valentine’s Day

Last updated on: February 14, 2017 at 1:39 pm by John Mark N. Reynolds

Knowing What the Card Means: Valentine’s Day 2017-02-14T13:39:18-04:00 John Mark N. Reynolds

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

When I was a boy, so long ago that you could play outside all day without adult supervision, there was an odd custom. At Clendenin Elementary School, we would hand out cards to everyone in the class. These cards were sometimes homemade, but most often purchased in boxes from Kroger’s.

There were Peanuts gang cards, but I preferred the more serious cards that had a lingering Victorian flavor. There was always one teacher card and that was easy to give away, but the rest of the choices were hard. (One year Mrs. Cobb’s card was unworthy of her . . . not nearly good enough. . . and that was difficult since my handwriting was done with my hand, but was nothing like writing.

I still feel shame. If you are out there Mrs. Cobb, I am sorry. I should have done better, but my card making skills were also bad.

Still, that was the easy call, the teacher card was what it was. The other cards were harder: What one for the best friend? What one for the kid you did not really like? How to decide?

Most difficult of all, was the card for the girl you liked, assuming you liked girls in third grade. I am not sure what it meant to like girls in third grade, but I did . . . one especially. Her name will remain my secret since I don’t want her grandchildren, if she has grandchildren, to piece this together and give her a hard time.

What follows was not at all her fault.

I finally settled on the perfect card: mostly blue, sparkles, with a cat. This was the perfect card. The sentiment was sentimental and I put my name (scrawl “John Mark”) on the back. The result was nothing. She did not respond at all when she opened it and put it in the mound of other cards.

Everyone gave everyone a card and she missed the awesome specialness of my card. To me it was shouting: “The best card is yours!” To her it was a card.

This story should end with my being crushed, but it does not. Somehow in third grade this was just what it was: disappointing, but there were cupcakes next. That was good.

At some point in my life, I realized that the problem was not the card (if only I picked the Peanuts set!) or the girl (Is love blind?), but the fact that no reasonable person could have decoded what I meant. My thoughts were in my head and my signals were very obscure. In this case, that was good.

Sadly, with those we love in later years, we behave in similar manners to young John Mark with his card. We labor to send an elaborate message to a friend, to a parent, to the beloved, but we work so hard on it that it becomes totally insider our head baseball. The only person that gets what we are saying is us and we already got it.

Here is a thought: flirting is fine, but communication is necessary. If you love her, tell her so. If you are angry, express it calmly the best you can. Nothing is worse than sending a signal of displeasure and having the beloved take it as a shout out. “You love this eggplant surprise? I will make it again.”

God so loved the world that He came Himself and told us directly He loved us all. Maybe I should do the same. And by the way: if you know a Mrs. Cobb in Clendenin, West Virginia, or you knew her, thank her for being a great teacher and giving me a love of theater. You are loved to this day . . . and I am sorry about the card.

Culture

Previous Post

February 13, 2017

By Any Means Necessary: A Worldview Failure

Next Post

February 15, 2017 Holmes, Houdini, and Looking for Mystery in all the Wrong Places

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Apologetics Art Culture Education On Books On Education Philosophy Politics Pop Culture Spiritual Reflections Uncategorized

Select a Month October 2026 September 2026 August 2026 July 2026 July 2025 June 2025 September 2024 July 2024 June 2024 December 2023 June 2023 September 2022 May 2022 April 2022 March 2022 February 2022 July 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

According to James, where does wisdom that is pure, peace-loving, and considerate come from?

Select your answer to see how you score.

From study From Prayer From heaven From experience

Books by This Author John Mark Reynolds

See All Titles »