Finding Us

Last updated on: July 25, 2016 at 11:16 pm by John Mark N. Reynolds

Finding Us 2016-07-25T23:16:18-04:00 John Mark N. Reynolds

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Church_of_SS_opt Don’t fix the problem that we do not have. Let’s fix the problem we have . . .

I have been to summer camps where the emphasis was on me: be faster, stronger, smarter. I have been to summer camps where the focus was on “culture:” save it, fix it, study it. Both approaches may have a place, but miss what seems most necessary just now. We need “us.”

So many of the people I meet are lonely, bored, or afraid and all of these are symptoms of a lack of love. Love cannot begin with self, but with another. There is no new life in loving myself, but when I love my neighbor, then our mutual love creates something new: us. The two of us can be friends and friendship creates all sorts of good things.

The problem with “knowing myself” by myself is that it is very hard to see myself. Even a mirror is a reflection and not “me.” Perhaps it is good that the best way to see myself is in conversation and life with other people. Focus on self is a good way for me to become very depressed! Narcissus looked at himself, but he never saw himself. He loved his image and not the person. Few things are more dreadful, but fewer things are easier in an era of easy imaging. I can see “myself’ or create images of myself as I wish I was . . . so easily. I am 53, nothing can change that reality (for good or bad), but I can play pretend online.

This is no good. Denying reality is no good. I am who I am, but I cannot know myself without help.

Fortunately, God so loved the world that He came and built a community, a gathering, where I can have friends, a pastor, and a community. I would rather be with Father Richard, Bob, Cate, David, Jon, Megan, Dan, Kris, Lily, Kate, Randy, Phil, Parnell, Leland, Amy, and my family (especially Hope!) than alone. This list offends me, because it is missing so many brothers and sisters. If the church played a bigger role in most lives, then we would know ourselves better.

As for culture, God bless it. “Saving” the culture is too much for any small community and certainly too much for me. It would require knowing what to do beyond platitudes and I do not know what to do. Instead, we can help our neighbor. That is so hard and complex that the only thing more difficult is letting our neighbor help us.

If we save our neighborhood enough times over the nation, then won’t culture be saved? Besides, people not culture are the focus. One child is more valuable than all of Bach, just as Bach, the man, is more important than his music. He lives in eternity with God and his music will only follow him if God chooses.

Mostly it is enough to be happy. I think of a dear friend who often feels unloved and sad. I hope she reads this and knows that I am saying to her: you are part of us. We need you. We do not want to go forward without you, because the beauty you create is valuable.

Just now, in America, we need “we the people” and not me or abstractions.

Or so it seems to me.

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