The Sleepy, Hungry, Busy Parent

Last updated on: January 12, 2018 at 2:26 pm by Kim Parker, LCSW

The Sleepy, Hungry, Busy Parent 2018-01-12T14:26:01+00:00 Kim Parker, LCSW

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Have you ever had one of those days? You know, when you’re too sleep deprived to open your eyes, and your stomach is growling because you have not had much time to eat, but you are too overwhelmed with your list of responsibilities to do either one? So you just end up writing a blog about it? Well, the other day, I found myself in just this situation. It was not fun. Quite debilitating and immobilizing, in fact. It’s even worse than writing fragmented sentences even though you realize that blogging allows you to break some of those hard drilled grammar rules you were ingrained with all through grade school.

Take care of yourself, Mom and Dad. Take time to stop, breathe, and feel. Notice your emotions and thoughts. Pause a little. Then prioritize which is most important to do. On top of the list should be self care, even though you are a parent. In fact, your dependents need you to take care of yourself first. How else will you have energy or motivation to interact with them well? This may be the very reason that on airplanes, the flight attendants instruct parents to put on our oxygen masks first before helping our children with them. Besides, helping professionals have to do self care in order to last in the business, and being a parent is like being a helping professional to little ones.

So yes, you can afford a little nap. You might need to cut out some other pleasurable activities that take time in your busy schedule. This may include those zoning out times you didn’t realize you do so often in front of the TV, computer, or other electronic entertainment. Napping is more essential than brain dead awake time. Sleep allows you to recharge, your body to be restored to full operating capacity. That way, when you are awake, you are functioning more efficiently. So go ahead and snooze away. Make time for it, especially if you’re convinced that you don’t have time. Every little bit helps.

Similarly, feed your body. Do not make a habit out of skipping meals. This shortcut is too costly as nutritionists will tell you. Try to snack on healthy grains, nuts, fruits or veggies if you don’t have time for a full course meal.

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But then make time to sit down for a full feeding at least once a day. How else can you adequately convince your toddlers to finish their food or eat until they’re full if you forget these basics yourself? So, pause from this blog if you are hungry and take care of your body. Some food is better than no food in my book. Like adequate sleep, you will need enough nutrition to get you through your busy day.

Finally, to tackle a full parent’s caseload for the day without dropping important balls. If I can write fragmented sentences, you can drop some responsibilities from your to-do list. Your kids will still survive. They do not need a perfectly efficient parent with a smoothly run household encased in a beautifully presented model home. I have to admit that at times, I daydream of this also. Then I realize that I need to snap out of it. It is much easier for us to wake ourselves out of daydreams than to “snap out” of depression. Unrealistic expectations coupled with inadequate support over long periods of time can lead me to depression. If my thoughts are not helpful, and I’m beating myself up much too often, I will have unwittingly immobilized myself.

Tell yourself out loud, I’m not too busy to take my nap, sit down and eat, and take care of my family. Everything else will have to wait. Saving tons of money to buy that new car? Nice but not necessary. My cranky but still working 20 year old sedan will do. Sending my child to that expensive summer camp? Nice but not necessary. They can learn social skills by practicing at home with my full attention. I can take them to the park to make friends with other important folks that inhabit this planet. You can really cross off a few items from your to do list. You might even find shortcuts to get the important things done. If not, try singing loudly, “Let it go…”

Now that I crossed off one task from my list, I’m going to eat, take a nap, and tackle some more items. What about you? Meet me here next week and tell me about it?

Photo credit: Wikimedia Commons

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