Negotiating for better results – lesson from a little kiddo

Last updated on: January 29, 2011 at 8:12 pm by Desh Kapoor

Negotiating for better results – lesson from a little kiddo 2011-01-29T20:12:43-06:00 Desh Kapoor

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

Life is tough for sure. And with different people in our lives working off of their own minds and conditioning, things can sometimes become really difficult to handle. One can often find oneself in situations where it might be very tough to get others to do what you want them to do. The experts of negotiation try to create as many options for the tough opponent so that s/he can come around to what you want him/her to do.

This “turning around” of the other person through creative negotiating technique and discussion is not easy. It has to be learnt, although some come born with it. LIke how this kid – my son – used it with his mother.

Around the middle of December, he was too much in to his Nintendo Dsi games. One fine day, my wife called him out and he didn’t respond. Fed up with his addiction, she took away to DSi and told him that he was “grounded” for two weeks. No DSi now! The kiddo was disappointed but went out to play and forgot about it. Or so we thought.

After a day, the kid thought the punishment of 2 weeks was quite harsh! So, he sneaked up to his mom, and asked her politely. “Mom, if I do a good deed for you, can you reduce my punishment to 2 days?”.

Enticed by his charm, my wife relented and agreed. Quick on the draw, the kiddo shot back “Thanks, Mom! Ok, so what should I do for you?” She was doing some kitchen work so asked him to help her. Which he did gladly. So, now he had accomplished the task of bringing the “unusually” long 2 weeks to a mere 2 days. Great achievement that.. huh!

Yeah, but the kiddo wasn’t satisfied. After a few hours he realized, even one more day was quite a lot.

So, this time after appealing to his Mom’s Altruism the first time, aimed at her emotional side. “Mom, its the holiday spirit these days, can you excuse my punishment? Why punish me during the festival week?”. There was no hint of desperation or meloncholy. Simply factual argument laid out properly. With a smile. Cute one at that!

The Mom relented again against the onslaught of this emotional hit. Now, my wife is no emotional tear jerker. She is pretty hard to play such hard-ball tactics with. But the little kiddo knew his strengths, the dynamics of his relationships, and his “opponents” weaknesses. He used them to the hilt. Until he had reduced a punishment of 2 weeks to just over a day!!

That’s a negotiating miracle!

Often we lay out our points and the opponent simply refuses to honor it. Then we are stuck. We think we cannot get any headway in the situation. That isn’t the truth. The way to approach that situation is to list all the contentious issues clearly that are the roadblock (have different reactions between you and the opponent). Then, think creatively of all the options that could apepal to the opponent – in the right words – and also work for your goal.

After figuring out “win-win” and appealing arguments, then approach the “opponent” again. This time, without any complaining or whining, just lay things out clearly along with your creative solutions. Chances are the person will come around. Completely sometimes.

Motivation and Personal Development

Previous Post

January 29, 2011

Free and fair investigation of "cases" against Swami Aseemananda

Next Post

January 31, 2011 Honesty is now obsolete....it died a slow death

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Aarti Achievement and Leadership AfPak Africa Annual and Year-end Asia Audio Australia Behavioural Sciences Bhagwad Gita Bhagwad Gita Blogging Blogs Business Business Intelligence Business Strategy Cannes Careers Chanakya China Conservation Corruption Creative Daily Links Desh Poems Development & Welfare Devotional Audio Devotional Songs Drama Earth Economics Education Entertainment Environment Europe Everyday Quotes Featured Articles Featured Songs Finance Flickr Pictures Food Geo-Political Global Warming Globalization Health & Medicine Hinduism Historic History Humour India Indian Culture Indian music Indian Weddings Israel Issues Legal Link Love Minorities Misc Motivation and Personal Development Movie Lists Movie Reviews Movies Mumbai terror attacks Natural Disasters Nature News Outsourcing Pakistan Parenting Personal Philosophy Poetry Politics Poverty Quotes Recipe Regular Blog Post Relationships Religion Religious/Spiritual Audio Sciences Showcase Slideshow South Asia Special Stories Spiritual Quotes Spirituality Sports Stories Strategy Technology Technology Terrorism Travel Uncategorized US Video Women Women_s Rights Worship Yoga

Select a Month December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 June 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 September 2014 August 2014 January 2014 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007 March 2007 February 2007 January 2007 December 2006 November 2006 October 2006 September 2006 August 2006 July 2006 June 2006 May 2006 April 2006 March 2006 February 2006 January 2006 December 2005 November 2005 October 2005 September 2005 August 2005

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

How many times does the Bible mention the word "love"?

Select your answer to see how you score.

500 Over 300 100 700