Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

The Deacon's Bench

Home
Catholic
Religion News
Homily for February 10, 2013: 5th Sunday in Ordinary Time

Homily for February 10, 2013: 5th Sunday in Ordinary Time

Last updated on: February 9, 2013 at 5:23 am by Deacon Greg Kandra

Homily for February 10, 2013: 5th Sunday in Ordinary Time 2013-02-09T05:23:40-05:00 Deacon Greg Kandra

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

[Click here for readings.]

For the last 24 hours or so, besides being buried in snow, we were buried in news about the snow. Weathermen were breathlessly tracking the storm. Among the things they liked to talk about were OTHER storms—blizzards that had blitzed New York in the last century.

One of them was the Blizzard of 1935. Across two days in late January of that year, nearly 18 inches of snow fell in a storm that stretched from the Gulf Coast all the way up to Maine.

For John and Ann Betar, in Connecticut, it was the first major storm in their life together. It wouldn’t be the last. The Betars were married two years earlier, in November of 1932. John worked as a fruit peddler and Ann’s parents had planned for her to marry someone else. But they defied her parents and eloped.

Defying the odds…their marriage endured. Three months ago, they celebrated their 80th wedding anniversary. John is 101 and Ann is 97. They have five children, 14 grandchildren and 16 great grandchildren. They still live in the home where they raised their children near Fairfield. And while we are watching the effects of this historic storm on the news and in our driveways, to John and Ann Betar, it is almost routine. I looked up the records from the US weather service. Across 80 years, they have lived through 17 massive storms.

And those are just the ones involving wind and snow.

There were other storms: the Depression, a World War, recessions, personal struggles, the ups and downs that are part of every life, every marriage. But as one of their daughters put it: “They were going against the odds…but when you make the choice they made, there is no other way but love.”

Last week, the Betars were honored by the Worldwide Marriage Encounter—the Catholic organization which marks this particular Sunday, the Sunday before Valentine’s Day, as World Marriage Day.

In the spirit of that day, and with a nod to the gospel we just heard, I think it’s safe to say that John and Ann Betar “put out into the deep.”They understand: that’s where you find a good catch.

And if you want to hold onto that catch, be prepared to work at it. The gospel tells us that the fishermen struggled with what they caught. They had to fight to hold onto it. In the end, Peter was so overwhelmed, it brought him to his knees before the Lord.

It is that way with fishing. It can be that way, too, with marriage.

Every year when I preach about World Marriage Day, I ask my wife what she thinks I should preach about. We will be marking our 27th wedding anniversary this spring—a few years behind the Betars—so I figure she qualifies as an expert. Is there any special wisdom she’d like me to impart? Siobhain’s answer is always the same: “Tell people to pray.”
That tells you all you need to know about how she has survived being married to me.

The fact remains: every great undertaking in life needs to begin with prayer. And every great undertaking in life, if done properly, is itself a kind of prayer. That includes marriage. Marriage is a vocation. But it is also a prayer. It is the Liturgy of Every Hour, the prayer of a lifetime.

It is an ongoing prayer of praise, a psalm of thanksgiving. It is a petition. Sometimes, it is a plea.

Sometimes it’s, “Please God, keep me from killing this person I’m married to. Please God make those socks get up off the floor and walk themselves into the hamper. Please God, I hope he doesn’t order the chili.”

But more often, the prayer is something much simpler.

Thank you, God, for giving me another person to share my life with.

Please God, let the biopsy be negative.

Dear God, help me find a job.

God, be with us on our journey.

Every day in marriage is a journey. We leave the shore, and put out into the deep. We head into uncharted waters—adjusting the sails, scanning the skies, following currents of commitment, and sacrifice, and love, no matter how high the waves or how fierce the wind.

And Siobhain is right: it helps, believe me, to pray. And to pray together.

Several years ago, my wife and I got into the practice of praying together every night. We pray for one another, for various intentions, for people we know who are in need. And we conclude with my father’s favorite prayer, the “Memorare” and then with the “Our Father.” That prayer, the Lord’s Prayer, may be the best marriage manual I know.

Father, it asks, Thy will be done.

Forgive us as we forgive each other.

Lead us not into temptation.

Lead us, I might add, into the deep.

A deep empathy for one another.

A deep desire —as the marriage rite puts it—to give and to forgive.

A deep commitment to be more closely united, truly, as one heart, one mind, one flesh.

A deep dedication, very simply, to love.

Married life has never been easy, especially today. I think we all know that. As we prepare to receive the Eucharist at this Mass, we pray for those married couples gathered around the Lord’s table. Pray for marriages facing their own storms.

And we pray, in a special way, for grace. Marriage is a sacrament— “an outward sign instituted by Christ that gives grace.” In marriage, that means the grace to endure together, to hope together, to sacrifice together, to bear life’s storms together. Every couple that has received that sacrament shares in that grace. Pray that we all share
it more generously with one another.

Last week, in an interview, John and Ann Betar said there was no one secret to a long and happy marriage. But John summed up his own marriage this way:

“We just live with contentment and we don’t live beyond our means,” he said. And he added some wisdom that has served them well.

He said: “Just go with the flow.”

In other words: have faith to go where the tide takes you.

And don’t be afraid to put out into the deep.

Deacons

Marriage

Previous Post

February 8, 2013

Firefighters sworn in on an iPad

Next Post

February 9, 2013 Bishop to deacons: “You will give glory to God and comfort to His people…”

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category "Mad Men" 9/11 advent All Things New Amazing video amazing videos amazon america Anglicans Anti-Catholicism art ascension thursday ash wednesday Atheists baltimore Bible Bishops Blogging bonnie engstrom Books bridgeport Brooklyn Chaplains children christian art christmas Church Churches CNEWA Converts criticism Deacons Death Penalty easter eastern christian Eastern Christians Ecumenism education Education Eucharist Europe euthanasia Evangelization Exorcism Family Feasts Gay rights Good Friday Great links Great Moments in Journalism Hanging with the saints heather renshaw Hispanic Catholics Hispanics History homelies Homilies Humor Hymn of the Week Immigration indianapolis Inspiration Interfaith news ireland Jesus Jews Journalism Judaism lent Liturgy logos Marriage Mary Media Medical news Mental health Middle East Monks Movies Music Muslims My world and welcome to it New Evangelization new york News Nuns Parenting Parish life peoria Persecution Politics politics Pope pope francis pope john paul Prayer Preaching Priests Pro-life Quote of the day radio rebecca frech ripp Ripped from the headlines rippred from the headlines Sacraments saints Scripture sex abuse Sex abuse crisis SEX ABUSE CRISIS TAGGED WITH: SEX ABUSE CRISIS The people in the pews the visitation project theatre This & that Thomas Merton Trappists TV Uncategorized uncategorized VATICAN Vatican vocation Vocations Voices & Views Women Worth a thousand words Writing Year of Faith year of mercy young people

Select a Month December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

What fruit did Adam and Eve eat in the Garden of Eden?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Lemon Banana Forbidden fruit Grape

Books by This Author Books by Deacon Greg Kandra

See All Titles »