Recapturing Civil Discourse

Last updated on: January 10, 2024 at 4:18 pm by Jon Goodwin

Recapturing Civil Discourse 2024-01-10T16:18:31-05:00 Jon Goodwin

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Four days ago marked the third anniversary of an ugly scene that unfolded in Washington DC. January 6th, will always be a day that I remember. A day where I didn’t get much work done as I sat in my office and watched in horror as a massive crowd marched to the Capital Building. Amongst the crowd one could see MAGA banners, Christian Flags, gallows, and even a Jesus saves sign.

I clicked on the facebook app and found myself a bit surprised at the silence. To me, this was a horrible day. No matter which side of the aisle you associate with, I do believe that we should be able to agree that January 6, 2021 was not a good day for our country. With that in mind, I quickly typed the following words,

My post said..

“Today will forever be an ugly stain on our nation but will also serve

as a great reminder to be thankful that God is the one on the throne.”

I refrained from taking shots at anyone and I refrained from taking sides. Rather I acknowledged the ugliness of the day and I acknowledged the supremacy of our God. I genuinely thought I was safe. Perhaps I am naïve to think that this would be received well but I purposely did not say, “Patriots tried to save the stolen election” or “thugs stormed the capital”. I did not say decry the evil nature of either party or even point out their redeeming qualities.

It quickly blew up. In fact, while I did not take down the post, I did delete a couple comments and hide another. I wasn’t ok with my Facebook wall become a warzone and still am a bit befuddled at why it did. For this reason I hesitated to mention this here and call attention to my page, but I do so because I have a very public life. I am on nearly every social media platform that exists, and they are all set to public. The world can quickly see what was written on my wall. Want to know who I am and what I am about, feel free to spy or give me a follow. Here is the link if it helps https://www.facebook.com/jon.goodwin.9/

My seemingly innocuous post quickly was redirected towards, “BLM riots” (Black Lives Matter can’t seem to be said or typed by those opposed), the southern border crisis, Jeffrey Epstein, and sex trafficking. None of which had any application to what I had written or was addressing.

2016

In 2016 I recall on more than one occasion telling people about my concern over Trump’s character and his ability to lead our nation. In fact, long before Trump was even nominated as the Republican candidate, I stated from my pulpit that I would not vote for a man who publicly spoke of abusing women. Years before my wife and I chose to no longer watch “The Apprentice” because the man in charge (Trump) was such an unkind bully with major character flaws. When I told people of my concern over Trump they would often reply with, “What, you’d rather have Hilary be president? And, you are ok with killing babies?” Pretty sure I never said either one of those things.

As a society we find that many live with the idea “if you aren’t for us, you are against us.” This is incredibly dangerous and divisive. We also live in a society that assumes that speaking on one issue means we don’t care about other issues. This is plain foolishness.

Some examples…

There are days when I will find myself having a conversation about my daughter who is in college. At times my other two children don’t even come up in the conversation. This does not mean that I don’t care about my two boys. It simply means I am having a conversation about my daughter.

On my wife’s birthday I will often write something up and put in on my Facebook wall. Thus, allowing the world to see that I love my wife, appreciate her, and am celebrating her birthday. On that day it would be wildly inappropriate for you to say, what about your parents’ birthdays? Don’t you care about them? It would be irrational and foolish.

If your best friend suffered from colon cancer and you made regular posts about colon cancer awareness, it would be wildly inappropriate if I challenged you on not caring about those who have brain cancer, premature children, and who are suffering from herpes. I mean, come one.

If our first response is offense because we heard a trigger word, we must stop blaming the trigger word and must acknowledge that perhaps we are the problem. A large portion of society has lost its ability to engage in civil discourse. In large part because they are angry and offended before a conversation even begins. They carry with them everywhere they go a suitcase and a backpack full of their offenses.

What would Jesus do?

What if we were loving and committed to making a connection before the conversation begins? In the Gospels, Jesus can be seen routinely engaging in conversation with those who were at odds with Him. Nicodemus was a pharisee and Jesus met with Him under the cover of darkness. Possibly because Nicodemus did not want His religious comrades to know He met with Jesus. From this conversation we find one of the most beautiful passages of Scripture in John 3 https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John+3&version=NIV. Jesus did not approach this meeting with the thought, now is my chance to put a Pharisee in his place. He approached the conversation with, now is my chance to show this man unconditional love. It is my chance to say, “For God so loved the world, and that means you Nicodemus.”

Until we commit to love first and to truly understand others, civil discourse will not exist. If it is to exist, who better to model it than those who claim to be Jesus followers.

I have never won an opponent by pointing out their flaws, but I have won them over by pointing out their value. Until I affirm them, I rarely am granted permission to share my perspective and my story. So next time you are tempted to hijack a conversation, don’t. Ask questions, have meaningful dialogue, seek to add value, dignity and respect into the life of the one you are engaging with. Arguments won’t change the world for good, but love and respect will.

After all, Jesus did say the second greatest commandment after loving God was to love your neighbor and your neighbor will feel more loved when we learn to stop telling them they are wrong and start asking them what led them to hold the position that they hold.

It would appear that the real reason many Christians are not effective in sharing their faith is because they are more passionate about sharing their opinions than they are showing off Jesus.