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Christian Marketing and Can an Energy Drink Really be Saved

Christian Marketing and Can an Energy Drink Really be Saved

Last updated on: June 11, 2026 at 12:02 pm by Shawn Paul Wood

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Christian Marketing and Can an Energy Drink Really be Saved 2026-06-11T12:02:42-05:00 Shawn Paul Wood

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What would Jesus drink?

Is that the next big Christian marketing slogan in faith-filled circles? It may as well. Have you seen what’s happening in Christianity these days?

It’s getting a little carried away, and it all began with an innocent podcast a few weeks back. You see, that’s when the latest trend in Christian marketing hit shelves in grocery stores, bodegas, and the dollar store down the street. We’re talking about Christian energy drinks.

Wait, what?!

This is different than placing a scripture or a cross on a shirt or that fancy biblical bread in the freezer section. People like to wear their salvation or eat in accordance with scriptural precepts. But, drink and thy shall be saved?!

Are Christians really this naive to think there’s a difference in the typical sugar and caffeine fix, and a Christian 5-hour energy? Maybe this is a matter of supporting our own? Or, is all that “sheep” stuff more apropos? (They are among the dimwitted of the animals, after all.)

Yeah, this hits close to home.

Before you determine if the Holy Ghost is bottled up, I encourage you to stay aware of other faith-based issues that hit “close to home.” Subscribe to our free newsletter to stay informed about what’s happening in the Church and how real Christians can help defend the love and work of Christ.

Prosperity (is Not) Theology

Kenneth Copeland on Bryce Crawford Podcast

Kenneth Copeland on Bryce Crawford’s Podcast (Image Credit: KCM.org)

It was the first in-person interview with Kenneth Copeland in a decade. He was on with a generational voice on Christianity, Bryce Crawford. Close to Home covered this event when it happened.

Among the many statements from the podcast was Crawford’s hesitation to accept what is called the “Prosperity Gospel.” You see, this young man hesitates to consider prosperity as a focal part of the Bible. For all the haters, let’s cover this:

The word “prosper” appears 49 times in the King James Bible.
It’s a Latin term, “prosperare,” meaning “to cause to succeed.”
Any parents who wouldn’t want to help their kids succeed? (If you said No, then you suck as parents.)
Why in the blue heaven wouldn’t we want to believe that God wants us to prosper with whatever we desire?

That’s it. Yes, many preachers have abused prosperity to fill their own coffers and linen-lined pockets. And yes, the Bible has been twisted like licorice to make the selfish rich and the innocent broke, busted, and disgusted. But, no, this is not some newfangled theology. Prosperity shouldn’t be set aside and have a pseudo-sacrilegious title. Jesus said it. Moses wrote it. David talked about it. And, regretfully, countless believers and disciples have struggled because of it.

God wants us to prosper. It’s true. And if anyone believes that, but says they do not, it’s Bryce Crawford himself.

He tells others he doesn’t believe in prosperity theology. That notwithstanding, Crawford was careful enough to feature product placement in a podcast that was certainly going to be a traffic juggernaut for the guy. (Look at the picture. That’s Bryce’s new venture next to both speakers.) And now, he’s on a speaking tour for $100 a ticket.

The guy wants to prosper, just like everyone on the planet. Crawford is not stealing from people. He’s taking advantage of marketing. That’s not theology; it’s life!

He’s trying to sell a few drinks and build his brand. Sure, dude waxes a little on the hypocritical side (like all the haters out there who do not live in abject poverty). They all exclaim they do not “believe in the prosperity theology.” However, they don’t believe in “being poor” either.

Like all Christians, Crawford believes in prosperity and knows it’s a theological issue. So, can we please quit talking out of both sides of our faces, people? Stop acting like we don’t want God Almighty to throw us a little change for a job well done.

God owns the cattle on 1,000 hills, right (Psalm 50:10)? There’s nothing wrong with asking for a double cheeseburger from Jesus.

Just own it, you dunderheads: If you work in the ministry, it is a job and you want a paycheck! If you have a Christian podcast, you want subs for advertising. Oh, and if you write for Jesus, you want readers and shares. You expect a check to pay the bills because few people do it for free. Not for nothing, but everyone thanks the Lord when money is in the checking account. Drop the not-so-clever cognomen and stop being two-faced about this.

Now, about those “Christian” energy drinks. Bruh.

Taste and See, Kinda

Christian marketing at a new low with "Christian" energy drinks

Image Credit: DrinkAgapeEnergy

It seems Bryce tapped into a trend, as Christian Energy Drinks are now a fun craze in the world of Christian marketing. Take “Agape Energy” here: Mighty Mango, Preachin’ Peach, Blessed Berry. Really?! This is what they create in those Adult Swim cartoons to make fun of Christians.

If that’s not holy enough for your taste buds, there’s lovely Yahweh Energy, for the Jesus in you.

Yahweh Energy drinks and Christian marketing gone wrong.

Image Credit: DrinkYahweh

That’s right. Two flavors. One purpose. Zero…reason to think you are any closer to Jesus for drinking this. And Bryce’s “Praise Energy” is the best because of his schmaltzy talking point.

“I just got convicted…I want to actually honor God with what I consume,” said the blossoming entrepreneur. “I want people to know that we love Jesus, Christian founders, Christian employees. I want this to plant seeds, start conversations. But further than that, clean ingredients, no caffeine.“

Yeah, Bryce. God already created something like that. It’s called water.

Listen, if you’re going to shill for an energy drink, don’t call it a “Christian drink.”

It’s a drink marketed to Christians who may see an ichthus on the can and think, “Praise the Lord.” Supporting Christian businesses is seriously important. People should absolutely be more kingdom-minded. Also, we should believe, for evangelists and Christian energy drink creators alike, that God wants us all to “prosper and be in health, even as your soul prospers” (3 John 1:2).

“Christian marketing” is a real thing.

There are swell agencies dedicated to understanding a faith-based audience and know how to use skills to get those particular products eyeballs and dollars. There is nothing wrong with reaching out to Christians for business. You think TBN, Daystar, The Word, or Victory Channel are selling ads on CBS News?! No, they target a believer’s audience. However, the church needs to be smart about marketing, not shady.

Christians should want to spend money on other Christians. They want to hear about Jesus and celebrate His name with clothing, entertainment, and food. Shoot, back to the podcast, Kenneth Copeland is a wise businessman and an author of over 100 books, but he’s got a big house, so he must be a crook? That’s lunacy. Find any investor and author of even 10 best-selling books, and I’ll show you Zillow and an impressive pad.

People pay for those books, just like they would for Stephen King, Colleen Hoover, or J.K. Rowling. But an evangelist who writes books and sells Christian merchandise is sinister? Everyone wishes they had a side hustle that generates a generous stream of income. Instead of calling these businesspeople crooks, let’s applaud Copeland, Crawford, and any other child of God for getting paid, and pray some of that anointing rubs off on our stream.

And if their side-hustle stream tastes like sugar-induced swill from the actual seaweed-ridden balm of Gilead in the form of an energy drink, then complain about that and not the fact that there’s a stream in the first place. Everyone is entitled to one of those, present company included.

You can’t get saved from a drink, so trust that we know Jesus didn’t take that particular wheel. It’s a bandwagon thing, everyone. Convincing people otherwise is even embarrassing to sheep.

General Christian

Business, Finance and Religion

About Shawn Paul Wood

Shawn Paul Wood, Th.D., is an award-winning copywriter, contributor, and content strategist, and ghostwriter of several faith-based articles, speeches, columns, and books who has worked for some of the most admirable brands in their respective industries for over 20 years. As Founder of Woodworks Communications, he leads teams of content strategists and marketing professionals to expand the brands of corporate leaders, serial entrepreneurs, and respected ministers of the Gospel. He aims to help others develop self-discovery through stories and the written word to proclaim the Word to the world. For more information about his portfolio or help telling your story, visit WoodworksCommunications.com. You can read more about the author here.

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