Frequently Searched Questions: Technology is an Edged Weapon

Last updated on: November 9, 2012 at 6:00 am by Alan Noble

Frequently Searched Questions: Technology is an Edged Weapon 2012-11-08T23:13:50-07:00 Alan Noble

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The following are actual search terms people typed into Google (Yahoo?) which directed them to CaPC. In most cases they didn’t find the answer they were looking for on our site. FSQ is an attempt to remedy this problem by answering some of the most (de)pressing questions sent to us through search terms.

This week’s theme is the Dangers of Technology.

Q 1. “Making secular music into Christian songs”

…is a horrible idea stop now.

Q 2. “Www.how can someone become a perfect suicide bomber?”

Http://www.StepOne-DontSearchGoogle.Com.

Q 3. “Father daughter date night creepy”

If you think it’s creepy, then it is. But if you just did this Google search to justify your decision to not buy your kid a cheeseburger and take her to see Wreck-It Ralph (in 3D), then you’re lame.

Poor fools. None of this is ergonomic.

Q 4. “Can playing video games kill you?”

Yes. See the 1983 documentary, Wargames. Or Darkwing Duck, Episode 29: “Whiffle While You Work” where Darkwing and Quakerjack get trapped in the Whiffleboy video game and almost don’t make it out, alive (1991). Chilling.

Q 5. “Country songs about dilemmas?”

I know nothing about “country” “music,” however, Google is a thing. So, here’s the best I could do based off of research:

“(Are) We Never Getting Back Together?”

“(Should we) Cruise?”

“(Ought we be) Blown Away?”

“(Is it Right for Her to be the) Fastest Girl in Town?”

“(Is it) Better (to) Dig Two?”

Q 6. “Christian bands like white stripes”

Fascinating! I’m partial to blue circles, myself.

Q 7. “Is taking pole dancing for your husband a sin?”

A sin? No, but you could be enabling his sloth. If he wants to pole dance then make him do it himself. You can’t do everything for the man. Biblical manhood and all that.

Q 8. “Wife retired plays computer games always feels bad.”

Try letting her win once in a while, jerk. Also, see Q 4.

Q 9. “Zombie apocalypse and Christian belief.”

Unfortunately I’m not well versed in dispensational eschatology. But if you are concerned, I can say that to the best of my knowledge Christians don’t belief that there will be a zombie apocalypse. A localized outbreak? Maybe.

Q10. “Technology is an edged weapon.”

Yes, and Google owns the patent for “Sharp thing you can hold in your hand for to cut,” so don’t expect much competition.

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