How "Taken" Challenged My Fathering

Last updated on: October 30, 2009 at 7:12 am by Dave Dunham

How "Taken" Challenged My Fathering 2009-10-30T07:12:38-06:00 Dave Dunham

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I have the world’s most beautiful and precious two year old girl. Okay, I know what you’re thinking and the answer is yes, “I am biased.” But I love my daughter more than nearly anyone in the whole world (with the exception of her mother who I love even more). But after having seen the movie “Taken” just last weekend my fathering was deeply challenged.

If you’re not familiar with “Taken” let me bring you up to speed. In the movie Liam Neeson plays retired CIA vet, Bryan Mills, who has moved to Los Angeles to be closer to his daughter whom he saw little of while serving his country. His daughter (Maggie Grace) loves her dad but is, like most teens, more interested in hanging out with friends. But when she goes on a trip to Paris and is abducted and sold as a sex slave it is her father who risks all and will stop at nothing to get her back. In many ways it’s a very basic film. It is not about sex traffiking, despite what some think. Sex trafficking is really nothing more than a vehicle that allows Neeson to kick butt for the next hour. But it is an intense thriller that led me to contemplate just how far I would go to save my daughter.

One scene in particular caught me off guard. While in Paris tracking down the kidnappers Neeson visits the home of an old friend in French government. He demands information from this friend, who refuses to give it. And then, without warning, Bryan pulls out a gun and shoots the man’s wife in the arm yelling that if he doesn’t give him the information the next bullet will go between her eyes. At that moment I thought to myself, “Could I do that?” If my daughter’s life was at stake could I shoot the wife of an old friend for information? Let aside the fact that I’ve never killed anything and know that I don’t have the skills to kill a room full of awful criminals, but do I have the guts to flesh wound a friend? Then it occured to me that I was, in fact, probaby just like most fathers.

Most fathers couldn’t do that, I assume, and thankfully most of us won’t ever have to do that. And in my little world what my daughter most needs is not a daddy who can fight off terrorists and kidnappers at the drop of a hat but a daddy who can spare time to read and play with his little princess. Where I think many fathers get it wrong is in the simple day-to-day stuff. This doesn’t mean I should be a wimp and a coward who can’t defend his family, but it does mean that I need to prioritize my life. I need to remember that God wants me to raise my children, not simply rescue them. So, interestingly enough, “Taken” has challenged me in my fathering, but in a way that is totally the opposite of what it presents. Fathers, simply be with your kids and let that be the primary way you “rescue them.”

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