total gross out

Last updated on: July 9, 2008 at 12:05 am by Mary Alice

total gross out 2008-07-09T00:05:00-06:00 Mary Alice

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If you are in your first trimester, stop reading immediately.

On our block, garbage is only collected once a week, so you have to stay fairly on top of things. For some reason, we have two town trash cans, and I was operating under the assumption that my husband was bringing both cans to the curb every Sunday night. Unfortunately, he was assuming that we were only putting trash into one of the cans. Well, you know what happens when you assume?

MAGGOTS!

That’s right friends, I looked out my kitchen window and saw some little white lines all over the navy trash can. I squinted and could see that they were moving. When I went outside to investigate, I encountered a can crawling with bug larvae. When I opened it I saw the one lonely trash bag in the bottom of a puddle of garbage juice, a took in a smell so much worse then the smell of old trash that it is past description, and saw that down there in the bottom of the can the number of wormy little white horrible disgusting things had to be in the millions. The trash could have been in that bags for weeks, we have no way of knowing, and could well have had diapers in it.

So, I tried hard most of the day not to think about it, and as soon as the kids were in bed I went out to clean up this mess. I have to admit, I was as terrified as I was disgusted. I am not sure what I thought those little larvae were going to do to me, but I said a prayer to Our Lady for strength and protection and set to my task.

She must have been there with me, because in the half hour or so that I was at work on this I could think only of the small blessings of the situation, which were as follows:

1. The hose reached the driveway
2. The driveway has a significant slope
3. I don’t have a job that requires me to do this on a regular basis
4. I know that my mother did this at least once her in life, so I knew that I could, too
5. I was going to take a warm bath as soon as I was finished
6. Safely past my first trimester, I was able to do the whole thing without puking

That is right, your prize for reading all the way to the bottom of this horrible post is my announcement on this blog that I am expecting my sixth child on December 9, which will be my 8th wedding anniversary. I had been waiting for some cute way to break the news, but I have gotten to 18 weeks without coming up with anything, so here it is. Ultrasound is in two weeks, and we do hope to find out and share the gender, there is a lot riding on it, so stay tuned!

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