{"id":12792,"date":"2024-06-25T05:00:12","date_gmt":"2024-06-25T09:00:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/askshaunti\/?p=12792"},"modified":"2024-06-24T20:55:53","modified_gmt":"2024-06-25T00:55:53","slug":"when-life-and-relationships-arent-what-you-hoped-part-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.patheos.com\/blogs\/askshaunti\/2024\/06\/when-life-and-relationships-arent-what-you-hoped-part-2\/","title":{"rendered":"When Life (and Relationships) Aren\u2019t What You Hoped (Part 2)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<\/head>
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This is the second part of a three-part series on what to do when life or relationships aren\u2019t what you wanted them to be. In last week\u2019s part 1<\/a><\/em> we started with a challenging but important first step. Today, we explore two more.<\/em><\/p>\n
I\u2019ve always wished I could draw, paint and do graphic design. I write books and I used to perform in musical theatre so I am not completely bereft of right-brain endeavors! But the drawing and design gene absolutely is not in my DNA. My best efforts are a step below stick figures.<\/p>\n
This may sound minor \u2013 but it is actually really frustrating for someone whose ministry involves constant work on creative materials.<\/p>\n
What about you? Do you find yourself \u201calways wishing\u201d that you were better at something? Or maybe the stakes are higher than a hobby: Maybe health limitations, relationship disappointments or any number of heartaches keep taking life in a direction that isn\u2019t what you hoped.<\/p>\n
There\u2019s a grief in that, isn\u2019t there? As we covered last week (please go back to read Part 1<\/a> if you missed it), we<\/strong> have to grieve what isn\u2019t and accept what is before we can move forward to enjoy what we have. <\/strong>So, when life isn\u2019t what we wanted, that\u2019s our first action step. Grieving what will never be.<\/p>\n
Sometimes this principle doesn\u2019t neatly (or even remotely) apply. For example, if there\u2019s emotional or physical abuse, infidelity, toxicity, or other serious and damaging issues, different rules are in effect: we need boundaries, safety, intervention, and counseling instead.<\/p>\n
But for many heartaches and letdowns, there can<\/em> be abundant life on the other side \u2013 and<\/em> we can be intentional about pursuing it. Last week we covered grief, which, of course, is not a snap-your-fingers-and-everything-is-better process. But grieving can actually be freeing. That\u2019s our aim with the next two steps.<\/p>\n
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