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What Parents Need to Know About College Kids & Mental Health

Last updated on: September 26, 2024 at 8:14 pm   by Shaunti Feldhahn

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What Parents Need to Know About College Kids & Mental Health 2024-09-26T20:14:46-04:00 Shaunti Feldhahn

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I am delighted this week to introduce you to my Executive Assistant Amy Masaschi, who has written a courageous piece about navigating her college freshman’s anxiety and depression last year. I’ll follow up next week with statistics every college parent needs to know – plus steps to take if your college student is slipping into an uncharacteristic depression or anxiety.

By Amy Masaschi

My son’s path to college was every bit as exciting as I had hoped it would be. A throwback to my own adventure-seeking college tour during my senior year of high school, his enthusiasm over campus visits almost made me want to relive four of the best years of my life.

Because that’s what they are for all college students, right? Four of the best years?

Quiet-spirited, easy-going, and adventurous, our son was ready to go to college. We even held him back in elementary school so that he would be 19, with an extra year of maturity under his belt, when he left.

After a pretty thorough college search, he landed on my alma mater—a mere 2.5 hours away from home. I couldn’t have written a better narrative.

A few days after we dropped him off, my husband checked on him. In response to his simple “How’s it going?” question, my husband got one word.

“Alright.”

We didn’t expect shouts of joy and reveille (for those of you who don’t have boys, one- or two-word answers are the norm). But we would have loved to have heard “It’s great” or at least “Good.”

We said we’d check in again in a few days once classes began.

At the next check-in, he was “just okay.” And then during our next conversation, at an overnight freshman retreat, our son sounded uncharacteristically uneasy and anxious. We chalked it up as just being sleep-deprived and overwhelmed with the intensity of college classes. But as the weeks went on, things didn’t improve.

One month after we dropped him off, we headed back for Parent’s Weekend. That weekend was the lowest I had ever seen him. His anxiety was palpable. He was experiencing panic attacks and depression.

He had experienced a bout of anxiety when he switched elementary schools, but we had been vigilant since then—especially when he transitioned from middle school to high school. He had made that adjustment seamlessly, excelling academically, joining the cross country and track teams, and making friends. Now, in college, he didn’t even seem like the same kid we dropped off four weeks earlier.

I still wasn’t fully grasping that all this was really happening.

 

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