The Ongoing Parental Debate: What freedoms/responsibilities are age-appropriate for our kids?

Last updated on: August 28, 2018 at 12:04 pm by Ashley Willis

The Ongoing Parental Debate: What freedoms/responsibilities are age-appropriate for our kids? 2018-08-28T12:04:58-04:00 Ashley Willis

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There is no one-size-fits-all approach when it comes to parenting. I’ve learned this when it comes to raising each of my own children! So, when I look at the far sides of the parenting spectrum when it comes to freedom/responsibility, I honestly believe the answer lies somewhere in the middle.

As parents, our whole job is to raise well-adjusted, loving, kind, generous, successful (definition varies from family to family), independent, and self-sustaining adults. Therefore, we must be willing to introduce more freedom and responsibilities little by little as they grow older. The kicker is that we often have different ideas of what task/freedom/responsibility is “age-appropriate.” And, that is precisely why the concerned neighbor reported the Chicago mom to the authorities. Some of us gasp at the thought of letting our eight year-olds even walk to a neighbor’s house, much less walk the dog, too. While, others of us have our six year-olds take the dog for a walk on a regular basis. It all depends on our perspectives–our own childhood experiences, the community norms that we live in, the state-wide age requirements we must abide to, and the amount of trust we have in each individual child we are raising. Again, we can’t take a one-size-fits-all approach to parenting. But, we can offer our children a little more freedom which allows them to gain our trust and even helps them to have a little more trust in themselves and their own capabilities as a human being.

Every freedom comes with some level of responsibility. As parents, we want to protect our children from failure and hurt, but these hard things are some important rites of passage in life. And, they are the very things that make our kids stronger in the long run. Sure, we should never purposely place our child in a dangerous situation, but we must also remember that we cannot shelter them from the realities of life forever. Instead, we much teach them how to make wise decisions, and we can give them some age-appropriate freedoms/responsibilities to help them learn and grow in wisdom.

What are some freedoms/responsibilities that you and your spouse (if married) can introduce to your child? Start small and then add to it as they prove themselves trustworthy. Remember: a butterfly doesn’t have the muscular capacity to fly without first struggling to escape it’s chrysalis. In the same way, we must lead our kids towards bravery, strength, honor, integrity, and independence little by little.

For more on this topic, be sure to read 5 Words that Could Change Your Life Forever.

Thank you so much for reading, sharing, and responding to this blog. Be blessed!

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