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Ashley Willis

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The ONE ISSUE that Could Either STRENGTHEN OR DESTROY Your Marriage

The ONE ISSUE that Could Either STRENGTHEN OR DESTROY Your Marriage

Last updated on: November 8, 2017 at 12:47 pm by Ashley Willis

The ONE ISSUE that Could Either STRENGTHEN OR DESTROY Your Marriage 2017-11-08T12:47:52-04:00 Ashley Willis

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When we marry, we tend to accept that our circumstances might change over time, but we assume that everything else--personalities, expectations, aspirations, preferences, etc.--will stay relatively the same. However, life can throw us some doozies, and it's hard to rise from the ashes unscathed and unchanged. It's in these tough seasons that marriages tend to unravel, and hearts tend to wander.

CHANGE.

When we marry, we tend to accept that our circumstances might change over time, but we assume that everything else–personalities, expectations, aspirations, preferences, etc.–will stay relatively the same. However, life can throw us some doozies, and it’s hard to rise from the ashes unscathed and unchanged. It’s in these tough seasons that marriages tend to unravel, and hearts tend to wander.

This is exactly what happened with Ray Kroc and his first wife, Ethel. They were married for 39 years! Yet, over time, the couple simply grew apart because their expectations and aspirations in life had changed.

As I watched this unfold on the movie screen, my heart felt heavy. All I could think was, “How could this happen after being together for so many years?” Yet, the more I thought about their circumstances, that one word–CHANGE–kept ringing in my ears. Ray Kroc liked change, and Ethel wanted stability. She tried to embrace the unpredictable side of her adventurous husband, but his constant business ventures and long stints away from home took a great toll on the marriage. And, one day, he broke the silence during one of their many conversation-less dinners at home and asked Ethel for a divorce. Heartbreaking.

I don’t know all the details of Ray and Ethel Kroc’s marriage, but I do know that change took a great toll on their marriage that ultimately ended in divorce after 39 years.

Friends, change is an inevitable part of life. We can’t escape it.

Through the years, we can experience unforeseen health issues, job losses, surprise pregnancies or the inability to conceive, failed adoptions, financial hardship, deaths in the family, and all kinds of hardship that can put a lot of strain on our marriage.

We can also have great career successes that cause us to move cities, long-anticipated pregnancies with multiples, breakout ideas that bring new opportunities and financial blessing, and many other good things. These favorable circumstances also force us to undergo changes as a couple that can cause to move in different directions and at different paces.

Both good AND tough circumstances have a way of changing our perspectives and our approach to life. And, even something that we thought was a huge blessing for our marriage and family can end up being the very thing that creates distance and frustration between a husband and a wife.

Friends, we don’t have to accept this fate. Change doesn’t have to ruin our marriages. In fact, we can embrace it and even celebrate together. But, this won’t happen without intentionality and effort. Here are 2 BIG ways married couples can grow stronger together through changes…

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