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Ashley Willis

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Family, Parenting and Religion
Taming the Ticking Time Bomb: How NOT to Yell at Your Kids

Taming the Ticking Time Bomb: How NOT to Yell at Your Kids

Last updated on: October 14, 2015 at 3:59 pm by Ashley Willis

Taming the Ticking Time Bomb: How NOT to Yell at Your Kids 2015-10-14T15:59:20-04:00 Ashley Willis

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Do you ever feel like you are a ticking time bomb with your kids some days?

For me it goes something like this…

I wake up in the morning to the sound of my two older boys fighting. In a tired stupor, I tell the boys to “get along” and b-line it to the coffee pot. Meanwhile, my toddler starts screaming somewhere in the house. I run towards the sound, still half-awake, only to find that he fell down and bumped his head for the 36th time after climbing on that thing that I asked him NOT to climb on for the 65th time. I kiss his boo boo and then scold him for not listening yet again.

I make my way back downstairs and the big boys are fighting again. I send each of them to their room only to realize that we only have ten minutes to get ready for school. Both boys are shirtless with horrific breath and crazy hair. So, the punishment of going to their bedroom upstairs is a dud.

Sigh.

Grumble.

I tell myself to shake it off and focus. We scramble to get dressed, brush teeth, and look semi-presentable for school. Then, we say a quick prayer and out the door they go. As I close the door and back up a little, I bump into my sweet husband…who I haven’t even said “hello” to this morning because I was so wrapped up in the kids and their shenanigans. We embrace for a few seconds, and then the baby starts crying.

My husband makes the baby a bottle and then has to head on to work. I sit down to feed the baby and my toddler becomes completely hysterical because he can’t find his Ninja Turtle.

Where is that Ninja Turtle?

So, I hold the baby AND bottle in his mouth in one arm while searching for the beloved, lost toy with the other. We can’t find it. I tell my toddler and try to give him another toy, but it just won’t cut it. I put the baby down, and search for my coffee.

When I find it, it’s cold.

Boo.

I go to the pantry to find something to eat and realize that the kids have eaten ALL of the one thing I wanted that morning.

Boo again.

Then, my exhausted brain starts ticking and eventually…

Kaboom. Enter “crazy mom”.

I’ve had it!

I just want a moment of silence!

I pace the floor. The kids are talking to me, but I’m so frustrated and angry that it all sounds like the teacher from “Charlie Brown”. I escape to my bedroom and plop down on the bed. Mad. Disappointed. Defeated.

Then, I feel guilty for even wanting a moment of silence.

What kind of mother tries to get away from her kids?

Dave and I were blessed to have kids, and the fact that I sometimes just want to escape to a quiet, kidless room is terrible, right?

Maybe. Maybe not.

Then, it hits me.

How can I expect to approach my kids in a peaceful manner, if I don’t allow myself to start the day in prayer – the only way I find peace?

Sometimes, I think I put too much stock in coffee…although, truth be told, I am not sure I could survive some mornings without it. But, coffee doesn’t give me peace. It just boosts my energy for a moment and sends me crashing down.

Only God can give me the strength I need to face the day. Friends, I don’t know about you, but I am in need of some supernatural strength. I love how Mark 4:39 describes the moment when Jesus calmed the chaotic ocean waves surrounding disciples in their boat. It says,

Then He arose and rebuked the wind, and said to the sea, “Peace, be still!” And the wind ceased and there was a great calm.

That’s our Savior. He can calm the ocean waves with three commanding words; He can most definitely calm my heart and even my chaotic mornings. I want to start my day with the only One who has the power to help me overcome complete chaos with peace and stillness. All I have to do is commune with Him in prayer – a quiet moment where its just my Savior and me having a conversation. Stillness. Peace.

Starting my day in prayer gives me time with my Savior, time to reflect, and time to replenish my soul.

Sweet Mamas, we can’t consider this quiet moment in the morning to be an afterthought or something we will “get to it if time allows”. We NEED this…for our sake and the sake of our families.

A moment with God in the morning will give us PEACE and POSITION us to boldly face the day.

We NEED strength to face our crazy blessed but crazy hectic days. We NEED peace to navigate sibling fights, children who didn’t put on their “listening ears”, and a “to-do” list that seems to grow exponentially every day. For more on this check out “The #1 Need of Most Families Today”.

Yes. We NEED a kid-free, silent moment ALONE to refuel and reconnect with our Savior before we utter a word to our kiddos.

I realize that many days this seems nearly impossible because we have some early-risers or kids who end up in bed with us, but we must find a way. Friends, I am challenging myself on this BIG TIME. This is something I need to make a daily priority as well (check out “3 BIG Triggers that Drive a Mom Crazy”).

So, what would it take? How can we make this happen for us?

It may take waking up earlier, asking a husband to take on certain morning tasks, or having older kids help out more in the morning. If none of those things are possible, maybe shuffling the morning routine would help. Allow the kids to read or watch a short program in the morning while you have your moment. The bottom line is we can make a way. Let’s DO THIS. Gone are the days of crazy mommy in the morning and awful mommy guilt trips afterwards. Yes, we will still make mistakes, but we will be in a much better state of mind and heart to weather the storms when they come.

Thanks so much for taking the time to read, respond to, and share this blog. Be blessed!

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