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Yes, Max Miller, She Would Have Made You Empanadas

Yes, Max Miller, She Would Have Made You Empanadas

Last updated on: August 10, 2026 at 7:39 am by Matthew Distefano

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Yes, Max Miller, She Would Have Made You Empanadas 2026-08-10T07:39:04-06:00 Matthew Distefano

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Ohio GOP Representative Max Miller is an alleged abuser of women and girls. His ex-wife, Emily Moreno, has, in my opinion, credibly accused the Republican lawmaker of spraying her with hot water, holding a gun to her head, and shoving her up against a wall. Oh, and that Mr. Miller broke his then 2-year-old daughter’s collarbone. Allegedly. For good measure, there is also an email from Emily begging for Max to return their daughter’s blue bunny that she sleeps with every night. Because if breaking bones isn’t enough, psychological abuse is always an option.

Again… allegedly.

But this isn’t just one set of incidences between one couple or family. Oh no! Stephanie Grisham, a former White House press secretary during Trump’s first term, alleges that while they were dating Miller pushed her up against a wall and slapped her in a Washington apartment. Going back further, reports have recently surfaced alleging that Mr. Miller pushed a peer down a set of stairs.

Don’t worry, though, folks. Mr. Miller, like all alleged abusers before him, denies everything. In fact, he’s the victim. All the women are horrible liars. How could we not see that!?

Of course, this tactic is called DARVO, which stands for Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender. Deny the allegations. Attack the ones bringing the allegations. Make himself out to be the victim of a witch hunt.

Sound like a familiar tactic? It’s because pretty much all victimizers use it. Trump’s done it. Swalwell’s done it. They all do it.

Max Miller put a nice little spin on his denials, though. And let me tell you, I actually can’t stop chuckling about it. In an ill-advised interview with CNN’s Jake Tapper, Mr. Miller states: “Six days later, she offered to cook empanadas for me for dinner. If I had assaulted her, would she have offered to cook me dinner six days later?”

Let me put this as plainly as I can: Yes, she absolutely would have done that. That’s what victims in abusive relationships do. They try to appease their abusers so that the abuse doesn’t keep happening. They blame themselves (because people like you gaslight them into believing it’s their fault). That’s exactly what the hell she would have done in an abusive relationship.

Allegedly.

It pains me that I have to write this. I guess that’s just the state of this country these days. It’s been this way for a long time, no doubt, but it just seems as if the abusers have really become emboldened by the Abuser-in-Chief himself, Mr. Donald J. Trump.

Not allegedly… criminally.

This is one of the effects of electing such a horrible man, and what I would want all decent people to realize. Even if you support/ed Trump because of his economic policies, his former anti-war stance, or some other “kitchen table” reason—all verifiably ridiculous in hindsight—you can’t escape the fact that placing him in power only endangers women and girls. Full stop. Mimetic theory teaches us that those who look to him as a model are only going to copy his abusive behavior. And wouldn’t you know it? That’s exactly what has happened.

How many GOP lawmakers and MAGA influencers are we going to have to hear about abusing women and girls? Too many. At least when Democrats do it, their careers implode into oblivion. The aforementioned Swalwell? Gone. Graham Platner. See ya! Dems aren’t perfect, but at least the most egregious abusers get ousted, and rightfully so.

But with this current abuser-centric movement, abusers go to the front of the line of power, while claiming victimage at every corner. Bunch of whiny-ass snowflake bitches, if you ask me.

So, please remember the tactics used by victimizers whenever the next powerful man has his dirty laundry aired. He will deny it. He will demonize his alleged victims before taking the role of victim himself. It’s a tale as old as time and a tactic as old as abuse itself.

If you’re navigating faith after certainty, loving Jesus but not the empire, or trying to hold on to hope in a burning world, you’re not alone. I explore these themes weekly on the Heretic Happy Hour podcast.

You can also explore my books—including Heretic!, The Wisdom of Hobbits, and others—right here: https://quoir.com/authors/matthew-j-distefano/

Thanks for reading. Thanks for thinking. And thanks for refusing to settle for easy answers.

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About Matthew John Distefano

Matthew J. Distefano is an award-winning author, best known for The Wisdom of Hobbits and Mimetic Theory & Middle-earth. He is the co-host of the popular Heretic Happy Hour podcast, co-owner of Quoir Publishing, and owner of Happy Woods Farm—a small permaculture farm nestled in the Sierra Nevada foothills of California. Matthew's thought-provoking work explores spirituality, theology, philosophy, politics, and culture, and his writing has been featured in Sojourners, Patheos, and beyond. He is a graduate of Chico State University, and when he's not writing, farming, or playing The Last of Us, he enjoys spending time with his wife and daughter. You can read more about the author here.

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