Fear is Not the Goal

Last updated on: May 20, 2013 at 12:01 pm by Aine Llewellyn

Fear is Not the Goal 2013-05-20T12:01:36-06:00 Aine Llewellyn

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

I get down on my knees a lot for my gods and spirits. (And you should read that in all the ways you can, just so you know.)

When I began working with the Ophelia, it was all fear and all stress all the time. I remember asking what she wanted from me, that she was putting me through so much. What did she want, that she was dragging me so low. Why was she carving holes into my body and soul – I knelt and begged and pleaded.

Rattle Snake by Kelsey Beckett

And then she came to me like the ocean, like the River, and I fell into her arms. I didn’t fear her in that moment. She comes to me now more often as the River, wild and dangerous but the threat of drowning lessened. She comes to me as quiet, cold water. She comes to me as a stunning woman in blue with dark eyes that see through me. She has woven cloaks of feather and black and stood thousands of feet taller than me, but she comes now to me no taller than my mortal mother. Her hands are healing. Her voice breaks the dam of stifled emotions, and I can hold onto her slippery algae hands as I sob.

I know understand the purpose of some of my experiences, when I was being dragged through mud and deep water and emotional trauma. I am certainly a better devotee having experienced that.

I’m also not so afraid. I certainly have points that will set me off – in her deep ocean manifestations, the Ophelia brings with her the slither of deep creatures that sends me hyperventilating – but even that is subdued. She can surely hurt me, god that she is, and she can change her form and attitude towards me as she wills.

But the goal is not fear. Even with the Dierne, who bares the name Fear*, the goal is fear before the fall, fear before the thrill, fear before something so, so much greater.

I don’t get on my knees because of fear. I get down on them because of trust.

Uncategorized

devotional polytheism

Previous Post

May 16, 2013

Oh No New Things

Next Post

May 20, 2013 A Few Points

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Uncategorized

Select a Month October 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 July 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz