Buddhist Catholic Contemplative Evangelical General Christian Hindu Jewish Latter-day Saint Muslim New Visions Progressive Christian

Beliefs

Topics

Columnists

Resource Library

Research Tools

Video

Podcasts

Thought Readers

Faith In Media Tracker

Newsletters

Ad-Free & Subscriber Log-In Subscription Support

Follow Patheos

A Belief Observed

Home
About

Home
Catholic
Of Perseverance and Participation Medals

Of Perseverance and Participation Medals

Last updated on: February 23, 2018 at 12:56 pm by credo

Of Perseverance and Participation Medals 2018-02-23T12:56:03-05:00 credo

LOGO Patheos Explore the world's faith through different perspectives on religion and spirituality! Patheos has the views of the prevalent religions and spiritualities of the world.

'The Medal in Question' by me!

‘The Medal in Question’ by me!

As the participation medal was draped around my eldest son’s neck, I felt a flood of conflicting emotions.

On the one hand, I could see the pride on my son’s face as he received his mass-produced medal. I recalled my own small trophies from my childhood. They sit in a box gathering dust beside the small plastic busts of classical composers that I received from my piano lessons. These cheap trinkets certainly weren’t life-changing. They didn’t cause me to expect the world to give me a hand-out, but they did provide a moment of joy. A joy so strong that, all these years later, I still can’t bring myself to throw them out.

As my grandmother once told my mother (and my mother has since plagiarized — I mean, passed on — and told me a billion times), “Remember how good you felt when you achieved.”

On the other hand, I’ve seen a rash of blogs, articles, videos, and memes decrying the participation medal as the source of all ills in the millennial generation. These commenters claim that the participation medal rewards mediocrity, dampens ambition, and fosters a sense of entitlement.

What is a dad to do?! I don’t want my children to be entitled, or to lose ambition! Don’t worry, it didn’t bother me long.

We Do Participation Medals

It took me less than a second to come to this decision. Over the course of this short, co-ed, non-tourney, soccer season, I watched my son play a new sport for the first time, and improve over the course of several weeks. I watched him practice, not complaining at his shortcomings, but dedicating himself to improve. I watched him persevere. In short, I watched my son achieve.

Did he win? Honestly, in this league they didn’t keep score of the games, there was no record. This was about young kids learning the fundamentals of a game and having fun. His team did well, but there was no tournament play to decide who won. But not everything in the world is locked into a win-lose dichotomy.

Win-win?

“Finishers Medal – Philly Distance Run” by nyflygirl76 / CC By 2.0

Frankly, I dare you to try and take away her medal simply because she didn’t finish in the top three. We have compartmentalized our mindsets when we have no problem with a marathon runner getting a medal for finishing, but deny the momentous efforts of our children. Their successes should be weighed on their own merits.

It’s interesting to me that when the conversation moves to matters economic success and systemic injustice, the folks who decry the participation medal are often the very same folks who insist that individual success is the ipso facto result of hard work and doesn’t affect the success of another. In their mind, everyone who works hard enough is capable of succeeding. In their mind, their own success doesn’t preclude the success of another, or capitalize on the shortfall of another. Yet we flip it around and tell our children that they are only rewarded if they beat everyone else. We are training our kids that individual effort is only praised when it comes at the expense of someone else. This smacks to me of inconsistency.

So we do participation medals in our home. My son will wear his medal with pride today. Tomorrow he’ll find a prominent place for it, and when he’s nearing 40 he’ll try to figure out how to handle the dusty box of meaningful trinkets. There will be a time where he’ll win (or lose) a tournament trophy, and that day will carry its own lessons. But today’s lesson is that he can succeed at his goals without someone else failing at theirs. Todays lesson is simply, “Remember how good it felt when you achieved.”

Previous Post

April 26, 2016

Of Humility and Humor

Next Post

May 6, 2016 Of Road Trips and Rest Stops

Browse Our Archives

Select a Category Guest Post I Concur Outside The Walls Radio Show Personal Story The Way I See It Uncategorized

Select a Month May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 October 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 January 2016

TAKE THE

Religious Wisdom Quiz

Which king asked Elijah for help against the armies of Moab and Edom?

Select your answer to see how you score.

Jehoram Joash Joram Jehoshaphat